So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
