I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
