On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
