she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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