what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I didn't notice because vodka
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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