The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
