I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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