Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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