Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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