So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
