We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
