I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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