I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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