But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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