Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
