I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
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