i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
