im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
