For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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