is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize
