So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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