He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
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