there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
