I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
