This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
