Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
So here I am, sexting at work.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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