So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
