YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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