I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
