She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I just cut my nipple shaving
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
