God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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