yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Randomize
