Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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