I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
