I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
