literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
