I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
operation harelip BJ is a go
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
