you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Alive.
So much puke
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
