I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
