Don't you send me to vm
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
