im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
