Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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