Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
did you just send me my own nude
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
