You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Randomize
