So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I think my moral compass just broke
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
