dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
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