rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
