Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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