So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
