Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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